how complicated is love? this question just popped up on my mind a while ago when i was talking with a dear friend. apparently, she's having a tough time with her love life.. or the lack of it..
you see, my friend, Camille, is somewhat confused because of a guy (let's call him Phil) who seems to have feelings for her. yes, Phil's adorable, responsible, well-mannered, God fearing and loving.. he has a good head on his shoulders and has qualites that easily attracts opposite sex.. however, this guy admitted that there is also someone else he considers special in his life (let's call the other special girl, Lauren).. but, he is not courting Lauren either..
while pondering on this, i tried to speak out what's on my mind and told Camille to forget about the guy.. in the first place, he isn't actually courting Camille - well, not yet.
Phil doesn't believe in courtship.. but Camille is a hopeless romantic, just like me.. i know most of the girls would like that from a guy - to be swoon & serenaded & courted - those kinds of stuffs.. so, if Phil is sooo not into those kinds of manifestation, then it means = minus pogi points..
but then again, Phil isn't into those kinds of love expressions. he's more into actions speak louder than words.. he wants a relationship to start with Magic! like when he is inlove with the girl, all he wants is for them to look at each other in the eye and sparks will fly away and boom! love starts..
anyway, my friend, Camille, started to doubt her feelings for the guy when she learned about the closeness of Phil and Lauren. he considers Lauren special. they are at ease with each other, they're so close, that when you see their body talk, it is as if they were really meant for each other. but he never discloses his intention or feelings for her.
on the other hand, he and Camille are also close in a somewhat more conventional way.. they exchange thoughts when they have a chance to talk.. they express / send sincere messages through SMS.. but when they are with their churchmates, they somewhat distance themselves from each other, for fear of getting close to each other, but the longing to be with one another is there..
get my drift? hmmm.. i don't think so.. that's why it is kinda complicated.. it is as if the guy is torn between two lovers. clearly, Camille have feelings for Phil .. but right now, Camille tries to shy away from him, to give him space and let him think better.. but Camille feels like she's on the edge of her seat when she does not hear anything from the guy.. she admitted to me that her day is not entirely complete if she never receive any info about Phil.. and she admits that she is hurting whenever she sees Phil & Lauren behave like childhood sweethearts in front of her..
yes, clearly, Camille is in love.. but of course, my girl won't make the first move... but what if Phil will never ever make the first move? what if Phil really likes Lauren but is afraid of getting dumped? what if he is just comfortable being around Lauren? what if the person he really likes is Camille? and what's gonna happen to Camille's feelings if she'll decide to totally forget all about Phil?
ahhh.. love is indeed mysterious.. sometimes, you can't have it both ways, you can never win and lose at the same time.. love is a many splendored things.. i can totally go on and babble all about love, and this question remains - how will love find it's way through Camille, Phil & Lauren?
the answer is simple - GOD. i told Camille to pray as hard as she can, pray for strength to be able to withstand whatever that is holding her back.. pray for guidance and deliverance.. and ask for a sign from HIM..
nevertheless, we also asked our colleague, Joshua about his opinion on this matter. luckily, Joshua had a lot of good things to say about it. he said, it is only natural for the girl to feel a little jealous when she knows that the apple of her eye is being smitten by another person. fromo a guy's perspective, he suggested Camille to do everything it takes to win the confidence of the man. but not in a competitive way.. to do this, she must somehow show the guy that there are things that she can do like care for him, be there for him when he needs help, always listen and continue spending time for that person even if she is busy.. it somehow helps a man to choose better if he knows the things that the other person may not be able to give.. 
upon hearing Joshua's words, Camille and I pondered and realized that it really helps when you talk to a guy who have experienced this situation. at least somehow, Camille learns something from a man's perspective...
how about you? have you even been in a situation like this? love is indeed complicated, but once yo get ithrough it, you know you will be on the right track...
P.S.. the situation above is true, however, i decided to change the names of the persons involve for security reasons & due to Camille's insistence.. because we never know if Phil is reading this..
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